We have all had the experience of feeling like we need to do a cleanse. A detox.
Many people feel this physically-especially after a period
of indulgence-like the very short but intense North American summer that we
have here. I myself start to feel
sluggish, like there is a build up in my body. I also feel restless and pent
up; like I am at once over-stimulated and under-nourished. I am restless, but I don’t have the
energy to do anything about it. We likely also see physical changes like skin
conditions (the skin is one of the biggest detoxification organs) or a change
in our bodyweight and composition. We start to say things like “I have to get
back on track”. “I can’t eat like this anymore.” “After the summer it’s back to
my usual routine.” That’s all well and good, but INITIATING a change, any
change, is a tougher process. Here I am going to change directions completely
and suggest a radically DIFFERENT approach to detoxing. It’s called a MIND
CLEANSE.
It is a fact that our experience of the outside world IS A RESULT OF OUR MIND. Our internal world creates our external world. THOUGHTS BECOME THINGS. So it stands to reason then, that if you want to detox your body, you need to detox your mind first.
And, that holds true for wanting to improve ANY area of your life-not just your waistline. The biggest problem we have in our lives is JUDGMENT, and its negative effects extend far beyond a few extra pounds where we don’t want it. Judgment of ourselves, judgment of situations, and judgment of others. Judgment and the resulting negativity is the biggest toxin of our time. It is the cancer from which all others are born. People hear me, it is really fucking bad! Do not underestimate how insidious it is. How toxic it is to your life. Use these three steps to detox from judgment and negativity and watch the pounds (of drama/ weight/ debt/ anxiety/ loneliness) drop away!
Step 1: Acknowledge that you want to change
If you suspect that you might benefit from less negativity, then the first step is admitting you have a problem.
OR If you are very used to living in a place of judgment, you might not even notice that you constantly judge yourself, others, or situations. Try this anyway: Set an intention today for yourself to just become aware of when you are judging yourself, others, or a situation. We do it so automatically: “That guy shouldn’t be allowed on the road”, “Her kid is out of control”, “Fuck, I skipped the gym again”, “Urgh, my hair today”, “He doesn’t know what he is talking about”…. on and on…a million times a day. You will start to see how OFTEN it happens-likely automatically. Now acknowledge and accept when it happens, instead of justifying it, or berating yourself. Just notice it and try not to judge your judging. (I know it’s fucking hard). Sometimes, just shining a light on a behavior releases it. That will be the case with many of your petty little judgments. You will find yourself just “lightening up” and improving your mood by noticing and letting go of the petty stuff.
BUT there will be some big ones that you feel will be almost
impossible to surmount. “BUT HE IS SUCH A DICK!” your mind will scream. Here is
a where you need to go further to release the toxic poison from your life.
Step 2: Journal/Talk to your Life
Coach/ Talk to a sacred friend
Follow my logic here: If judgment and resistance actually WORKED as a strategy to change situations, people, and ourselves, the world would be perfect, because judging is automatic for all humans!
We all do it, all the time, and it is obviously not helping. If that were the case then all the road rage in the world would eradicate bad driving in one rush hour. That person you hate would magically change their behavior for the better. Ha. Ha. You wish. Judgment doesn’t work-it creates a vortex that sucks in more of the same. In fact, we have all had the experience of seeing how a bad attitude makes everything worse. Following this logic, you must then work to release the resistance to find a solution. But how? VENT!
Be as petty and nasty as you
want, but make sure it doesn’t end there. Remember that judging and negativity
are poison that YOU are drinking, and expecting the “thing” you are judging to
die. Nope. Not gonna work. I find
it helps to write at the top of my journal page: I intend to see this situation differently and find my highest good.
Then I start to describe the situation that I am judging. It works just as well
if the situation is a family member that did that thing you hate, a bad driver,
or your fat thighs. Journal for as long as it takes, and don’t censor yourself.
You will likely find that your intense anger will transmute into sadness/fear/
hurt or other emotions. Keep writing.
Journal until you find you have run the gamut; until you “run out” of emotions;
until thinking about he topic doesn’t elicit much emotion at all.
*If you are venting to a person,
make sure they know what to do: They are holding space for you to vent, which
means they should be like a journal… they don’t say much except to acknowledge
that they are hearing you. They do not feed your judgment or agree. If they
speak it is ONLY to remind you that the purpose of the conversation is to see
things differently, and to let go of resistance. That is why a life coach is a
better option, as they have experience in this and can smooth the process for
you. Either way, vent until you feel the release from the grip of
rage/sadness/disappointment/bitchiness etc.
Step 3. BREATHE
Take a deep breath and feel the
peace that accompanies having nothing left to be upset about. That peace and
serenity- and eventually acceptance as you keep up with this practice- is your birthright. It also happens to be the
energy from which real change in your life is created. From that place of
peace, you can affect the areas of your life that you are not satisfied with.
Even the people that most piss you off seem to miraculously stop their
behavior, or it just doesn’t affect you as much. You are back in control. It is
SUCH an empowering position to live from. When you judge, you give away your
power. When you accept, you become so powerful it will blow your fucking mind!
Things change effortlessly. People bend to your “will”. Life flows. It is
SERIOUSLY miraculous.
HERE is an extra video on the topic.
Good Luck xoxo
